Closer to the truth than it should be department

Thank God they're there to tell it like it is.

"The scorched-earth battle over the future of Social Security got a little nastier today with the release of a new television ad in which the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth attacked the Vietnam War record of the American Association of Retired Persons (AARP).

The Swift Boat Veterans, dormant in the months following the 2004 election, called their anti-AARP ad 'our finest work to date.'

In the controversial commercial, a swift boat veteran named Davis Debrew claims to have served on the same swift boat as the AARP during the Vietnam War.

'While the rest of us were in the front of the boat shooting at the Vietcong, the AARP was in the back of the boat talking about how to bankrupt Social Security,' Mr. Debrew says.

But within hours of the commercial's first airing, the AARP disputed Mr. Debrew's claims, arguing that there was no way a retirees' organization numbering 35 million members could ever have fit on a craft as small and light as a swift boat.

The ad was released just as a new study from the Brookings Institution found that the money spent on anti-AARP ads, if invested in Social Security instead, could keep the program solvent until the year 2200.

In response to the Brookings study, swift boat veteran Debrew said, 'I served on the same boat as the Brookings Institution, and when it came time to shoot at the Vietcong, they were no help at all.'

Elsewhere, former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein blasted U.S. officials for arresting his half-brother but offered them the name and address of his mother-in-law. "

Source: The Borowitz Report